Although
I started this for myself, I’m surprised at how many people are reading my
blog: over 3500 in the past month, and 8000+ ever. When I look at Facebook I’ll
see a post that has maybe a dozen “Likes” and maybe a comment or two – and then
go look at the Stats on my blog and see that over 200 people have read it.
Don’t get
me wrong – I am incredibly flattered. I started this 83-day Journey for myself, but between the Comments, Facebook Messages, and personal
conversations I am learning that there are quite a few people out there that
are silently reading it. And from a few of the messages I’ve received, it’s
helping others too.
As a
kid, I used to press my ear against my bedroom wall – and early mornings and
late nights I could hear the tap-tap-tap of my father typing in the Kitchen.
Dad was always a writer. Born into a newspaper family, he grew up with ink in
his blood – and watched his father and grandfather work at getting the paper
out together every day. When he was age 23, Dad bought out his grandfather’s
share of the Preston Citizen – and was the youngest newspaper owner in Idaho’s
history (at least at the time). Even long after he sold (due to WWII), he
continue to write – Red Cross, United Way, Kiwanis, and pretty much any
organization he was involved in benefitted from his gift for writing. He was
the editor of the Cal-Nev-Ha newspaper for Kiwanis for over 20 years. Even into
his 80s, Dad worked on his Personal History – and a novel he’d always wanted to
write, that he passed along to me to finish. And it’s literally in our blood,
because among my uncles and cousins, there are at least a dozen of us that write
– both personally and professionally. I guess it’s just what Roes do.
And in
today’s society, we are readers. We are Information Junkies. Even within
Facebook, I think my newstream is filled with as many Shared Links as
personally posted photos and updates. Nobody uses an encyclopedia anymore – we
just Google it, and often end up on someone’s blog. Sometimes just for a random
bit of information or instruction, sometimes we follow blogs of specific people
we like or are interested in.
We have
become Internet Voyeurs. Without even leaving our house, we can be Peeping
Toms, looking into the windows of people all over the country, all over the
world. Through their blogs we sneak-a-peek through their curtains and see what
it going on inside. And as someone who lives in a glass house, I have
admittedly left the curtains wide open.
Sometimes
I write something that I expect to get read, like Divorce vs. Annulment – because it was something that I couldn’t find information about. Sometimes
it’s something that I know is a bit of a “Hot Topic” like Women and the Priesthood – which I want to express my opinion about. But sometimes
it’s just my personal ramblings about my messy desk or playing the piano – and still they get read. And there is something about knowing that
people are reading that pushes me to continue to write, to try to be funny or
eloquent, to push myself as a writer more than I ever have.
That’s
really why I started blogging – because it pushes me beyond my own limits. I’ve
been a rather faithful Journal Writer for many years. Many (if not most) of my
journal entries never get finished – but I just stop when I run out of time.
But with blogging, it has to be thought-out and complete. I write a rough
draft, and I go back and edit it (usually a couple of times). I take some time
to find a photo or quote (or two) that I think adds to my own words. It’s a
finished and completed Writing – hopefully with a cherry on top.
Because,
in reality, it isn’t just a few hundred random words that I’m putting out there
– it’s a part of me, maybe the deepest part of me. Writing is looking deep
within, and finding some small piece of my soul to share with the world – and polishing it and shaping
it. For most of my life, all of my writing just got shoved in a drawer or tucked on a shelf. But this blogging world has allowed me to put my heart out there.
It’s scary – rather terrifying – to do, but also incredibly rewarding too.
So I
do it, every day, for a whole month now. Putting my heart on paper, and waiting –
wondering what people will think. For the most part, I have no idea what people
really think. These Internet Voyeurs stalk around silently, so I have no idea
who they are or what they think. But I am grateful for the positive comments
from friends, and for the reading by strangers too. And, because I have shared
this piece of my soul with you, that somehow connects us – makes us friends.
And more than the thousands of clicks on my blog, I’m grateful for the hundreds of new connections that I have out there in the world.
I
will write until not a single word
remains in my soul …
until every story in my
heart has been told …
until my mind’s well of ideas is bone dry …
and even then
I will write on
because writing is not just something I do
but part of who I am.
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