DAY 17 - GIRLS NIGHT OUT

Every few months I get together with “The Girls” – friends from a previous workplace, Tahitian Noni. About half of us have moved on to other jobs, and the other half are still there. But it’s not about the workplace – that just happens to be what brought us together. Admittedly we used to spend about 40-hours each week together, and that created a bond between us – because over the years that we worked together, much more happened. Beyond just working together, we shared our lives with each other – and from that we fashioned threads that have weaved our lives together far beyond just being “former coworkers”, and even far more than just friends.

Back: Rithzane Nerelus, Kika VilaNova, Rhoda Debes,
Gena Roe. Front: Amelia George, Yvonne Gonzalez.

   If we were in Oakland, these dear ladies probably would be my “Homies”. If we were in biblical times, there would be a reference to Ruth. And in my life, these are my “Girls” – the always-there and always-on-my-side no-matter-what friends that are so much more than friends.

   When we get together, it’s a no-husbands (and usually no-kids) kind of evening – mostly because when we get “going” we just don’t want to be interrupted, and quite honestly no sane man would want to be there. And although we usually get together at a restaurant to Catch-Up, I usually feel bad for the waiter – because we are loud, hard to get an order from, and stay for a few hours to catch-up on everyone’s lives.

   Admittedly there is usually a bit of gossip – but it’s typically because we want to know “the rest of the story” – and in our group, usually someone can fill-in the blanks. But mostly it’s just to find out where other friends have ended up, because the more years that pass the farther spread-out we end up. When you have so many friends heading so many directions, it’s nice to pull together and remember the good times you shared.

Back: Gena Roe, Kika VilaNova, Mafile'o Latu Hafoka
Front: Yvonne Gonzalez, Amelia George, Zulay Improta

   I truly love these women. They are far more than former colleagues – they are a part of my heart. And women need women to connect with, to share with, and to learn from. These ladies were there for me as my marriage crumbled. They were there when I got back from the Emergency Room with my hand bandaged. They threw me a Bridal Shower a few months ago, and then another dinner shortly after I was single again. Because women support and care for each other – especially during times of trials.

   And that’s really what is best about Girls Night Out. It’s fun to Catch-Up. It’s fun to “dish” a little too. But it’s amazing to get together as a sweet reminder that we are there for each other, to love and support one another, and that there is always someone that will be there for you. Lately for me that has been a tremendous blessing. Even 1000-miles from home, dealing with all the heartbreak and pain in my life – I knew that I had an amazing support group, including these amazing women.

   We are a rather diverse group: there is a 40+ year range from youngest to oldest; we literally come from every corner of the world – including North, Central, and South America, Europe, Asia, etc.; and we range in height, size, hair, skin, and eye color. And none of that matters in the slightest. Because what’s truly important, what binds us together is something that you can’t see, something that you can’t list on paper. There is an Intangible that connects us – part of it is friendship, part of it is womanhood, and part of it is something divine.

Each of us has lived through 
some devastation, some loneliness, 
some weather superstorm or spiritual superstorm. 
When we look at each other 

we must say, I understand. 
I understand how you feel 
because I have been there myself. 
We must support each other because 
each of us is more alike than we are unalike. 

– Maya Angelou